"meaninglessness (part 2)"

DESCRIPTION: just got a sudden strike of "aw man thius is all pointless anyway" but i already told myself i would fight it off, i won't let it reach me again, i'll hold onto this light i've drawn with my own hands as hard as i possibly can

i don't know what the point of any of this is
so i just grasp my pen and limply write
writing a story, another one, like everyone else's
a story about a million meaningless moments

i'll keep doing it, because
this is the only way to stave the future off
i can't see the light you people see so
i'll pretend i do, and close my eyes

even so
why is it that i hold it in my hands?
why is it that these moments, i long for something unknown to come true?

i don't know, i don't know what it is anymore
but while there's still blood pumping through my body
then i'll make it count

i don't know what the point of this is
so i'll hold my pen tightly like i mean it
i'll put pressure the the page until the lead snaps
that's all

i'll keep doing it, because
this is the only way i know to reach the future
because i'm sure if someone as worthless as you can do it
then i can probably do it too

and so,
i'll describe this light i can't even see
and hopefully, those lies i've told will one day come true

my eyes are closed, so i don't know what it means but
they'll surely open someday
one day, i will have finally found the answer
i'm certain i will